| |
| |
|
Goal Setting Information |
|
|
|
Is that W-A-L-R-U-S?
A few years back, I went to London, England. I needed to get a passport-like photo taken, but the machine I wanted to use was out of order. When I called the company who owned the machine, I asked where they had another location. I was told, "Walrus." "Walrus?" I confirmed. "Walrus," was the response. I should have asked for the spelling, but the person had said, "Walrus." I asked around, and no one knew where there was a "Walrus" until, that is, someone realized that "Walrus" was "Woolworth's." Apparently, the person I spoke with and I both thought we were saying the same thing - but boy, were we not! Similarly, while I was there, I learned that elevators are called "lifts," escalators are called "elevators," what we would call subways are underground walkways for them, and what we would call subways in the US, are called "tubes" in the UK. We speak the same language, don't we? And yet, as you have probably realized, there is a great potential for misunderstanding. In this case, it is quite easy to see how there would be an error. However if one did not know these differences, and did not know that there WAS a difference, can you imagine the frustration? Asking around for "Walrus" was quite frustrating! In a case like the above, it would probably be fairly easy to forgive a misunderstanding - and even define the differences. After all, most would recognize that it's a different culture, and the differences are to be expected. However, most people who live in a similar place would not be as likely to expect these types of misunderstandings from words. As a result, they would have expectations from a conversation, not realizing that they may define things, or hear something, differently than how the person who spoke it meant it. What happens in those times when someone tells another "Woolworth's", and the other hears "Walrus," and neither knows what the other thinks they've said? Quite possibly there could be conflict, argument, upset. And neither would know how to fix it. After all, weren't they both saying the same thing? Hmmm. Does this sound like anything you've experienced? My example is quite humorous in retrospect. But oftentimes when this happens it is not - especially not in the context of close or intimate relationships. We want, and expect, those closest to us to the person we need, do the things we want, and say all the right things. In some cases, this person may think they are, but how you hear, see, or experience it, has you feel otherwise. The next time you have a disagreement, consider this: Words were just the beginning of your conversation. - Ask the other person to tell you what they think was said - the words, and the meaning behind the words. Listen carefully for differences in "accent" and meaning. - Ask for spellings. Is that "W-A-L-R-U-S?" In other words, "THIS is what I have heard, am I hearing your correctly?" - Ask for pictures, "Can you show me a picture of the elevator, or describe it to me?" In other words, "How does (THE THING YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT) look, feel, sound to you?" How do you know what it "looks" like? How will you know it when you are it, experience it, or see it? - Take no meaning, or word, for granted. If anything, consider that all that you "know" means something other than what you think. It's important to remember that we don't all hear things the same way, and we don't have the same experiences. Words are only the starting place for our communications. How someone experiences what we say will have greater impact on our conversation - and its effectiveness - than what we meant, or what we said. ©2005 Essa Alraune. Essa has a varied, non-judgmental, and fun approach to the work she does as a StressBusterBuddy. She works primarily with individuals on a one-on-one basis, and is the Author and Publisher of a mindful meditation CD. To learn more about Essa, her CD, or to listen to her online recordings, visit http://www.StopKickingYourself.com or call 212.560.7582 (where you can also hear a 3-minute Relieve Stress Recording - only local, toll, or long distance charges apply).
MORE RESOURCES:
Goal-Setting - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
A Winner Never Uses Chance or Luck to Win In games of chance, what separates a player from a winner and are they mutually exclusive?It takes some skill to be a good poker player. Certainly one needs to know the number of cards in a deck, how many suits in each deck and what the different hands are and which hand beats which. Hearing and Seeing Your Destiny As a child, I read an autobiography of Annie Sullivan. She was the woman who brought Helen Keller out of her dark and silent world and into a place of understanding few of us in the hearing and seeing world fully grasp. The Process of Developing Meaningful Goals DEVELOPING A GOAL-SETTING CHECKPOINT: The process of developing meaningful goals and objectives can be a challenging task for any manager. There is a method to make this process easier, however, and it involves following a few general guidelines. 19 Ultimate Success Tips for your Online Business 1. Your first ultimate start must include written goals and plans. Discovering Your Values In the last newsletter we talked about 'Your Reason Why', and how having emotional reasons for doing things gives them real power. To see this article go to www. Competition, Jealousy And Goals Naturally some of us are more competitive than others, but the vast majority of us have a good degree of competition hardwired into us. If you think you are not competitive in the least, ask yourself: have you ever felt a twinge of desire, jealousy or envy when looking at another person's accomplishments or lifestyle? If you said yes, you are competitive - otherwise you wouldn't care what others have. 7 Effective Ways To Set Your Goals In Motion Today 1. Stop seeking approval from people. Conquering Goals: The Battle Plan "To accomplish great things we must not only act, but also dream, not only plan, but also believe."(Anatole France) While these three items define success, without all of them success would be unattainable. Getting To Good: Your Spontaneous Woo Quotient As I was driving to a friend's house, I passed the Dublin Pub, a local watering hole known for its live music. On the reader board, one band's name caught my eye: Spontaneous Woo. Actual Achievement Part 1 Sport is an excellent medium in which to explore the mechanics of achievement. My own background is in Whitewater Canoe Slalom, which requires power and technique in a constantly changing environment. Goal Setting for Creative Professionals You know that old saying -- if you don't know where you're going, any path will get you there. That's what happens if you don't take the time to figure out what your goals are and WRITE them down. Achieve Your Goal Have you seen those ads that promise to make thousands and millions of dollars over night, they are just hype. You have to do whatever it takes to get where you want to be. Got Purpose? Is your life on purpose? Does just the question stop you in your tracks? Have you been so caught up in the pace of our world that you've not even thought lately about whether or not your life is going in the right direction?Of course, living a life on purpose starts with knowing what your purpose is. Are you crystal clear about what the purpose of your life is? If you aren't sure, then you've just identified the place at which you should start a new life of purpose. Focus = Clarity Photographs are clearer when they are in focus. When they are out of focus, they are blurry, indistinct. Keep a Dream Journal: Why Bother? Want a key to unlock your inner wisdom? Try keeping a dream journal.Experts believe that our nighttime dreams deal with concerns, worries, or events that we experience during our waking hours. Making The Goal-Setting Process a Partnership MAKING GOALS: Effective and motivational goals engage employees in work they can realistically perform and complete, and which has been shown to be relevant both to the organization and to the employees' interests.MAKE THE GOAL-SETTING PROCESS A PARTNERSHIP: There are four kinds of goals you and your employees should discuss and develop together: 1. The Stories We Tell Ourselves The Hasidic master, Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach taught that on Passover night we are bringing our entire life stories to the Seder table to be freed. What exactly does this mean? To begin with, we are by nature, storytellers. Seven Deadly Enemies That Stop You From Reaching Your Goals Everybody on this planet has enemies, rivals and foes. Call them any way you like, but nevertheless they exist, chasing you at every step you make. The Top 10 Questions to Ask Your Goals Human beings are goal-seeking creatures. We are impatient and try, and fall, and try again until we learn to walk. Climb and Summit Mt. Goals Are you trying to reach a goal that feels like a large mountain to climb?Climbing a mountain is much easier than one would think. You start at the bottom, you progress towards base camp, you hit the middle of the mountain, and then you reach the summit.
|
| home | index |site map |
| © 2006 |