Holidays Information

Going Solo on Valentines Day: Advice For Singles


The stores are decorated in candy hearts, flowers and bears. Every TV or radio commercial reminds you that it's time to remember your sweetheart on this special day for lovers. Your feelings range from sadness, to revulsion to anger. What's a single person to do? The following suggestions are designed to both answer that question and to help you have a good day after all, while working to make it your last solo one.

Celebrate the day by planning an activity that is meaningful and enjoyable to you.

Choose something that provides you with a special treat.

* Go to a day spa for "the works"

* plan an intimate dinner for 3 or 4

* go ice-skating or to the movies with a fun friend

* go out to dinner and a movie with a group of other singles

* Focus on what you enjoy and make a conscious decision about how to mark the day

* Un-Valentines Day parties are very popular and can be a lot of silly fun. You can attend one or throw one of your own.

Design a relationship-building plan.

Let the holiday provide you with the motivation to take risks, try new ideas and gain the knowledge that will enable you to find and create a lasting, intimate relationship.

* Sit down at the computer or with pen and paper in hand and get your plan written down.

* Begin by making a list of resources that can be used to help you meet available singles. These can include: on-line dating sites, singles groups, volunteer activities, or participation in sports or other activities that you enjoy.

*Decide when and how often you will participate in any activity you have chosen.

*Make a budget for both time and available funds for this purpose.

*Do your homework and research each resource so the information will be available when you need it.

Review those resolutions you made, or make some if you haven't yet.

Think about what is really important to you. Remind yourself that implementing and sticking to these will help ensure that you are really ready for that special relationship. Being the kind of person you want to be with is the first step.

Begin with concrete goals. For example:

*stick with a healthy diet

* exercise three times a week

* plan one organizational task per week, etc.

Taking care of yourself and living well will optimize your chances for relationship success. Start today.

Work to eliminate negative thinking.

When a negative thought comes into your mind, take a moment to think about what is beneath it. Then, tell yourself that thinking this way is not good for you. Make a decision to drop the thought and try to think of something (anything) that is positive. It can be as simple as focusing on what a beautiful day it is outside, to feeling grateful that you survived the current wave of lay-offs in your company.

Use this technique for situations as well. Ask yourself how you can view the situation differently. Try to find one positive angle or outcome that could result from an otherwise bad situation. For example, you are being laid off from your job. You have been unhappy for a long time, but could not motivate yourself to do anything about it. Now, you have the motivation to look for a new job, or perhaps change careers. Think of all the possibilities that could open up for you.

Negative thinking is a downward spiral that leads to negative behavior and possibly depression. Consciously choose to challenge these thoughts, and empower yourself with a more positive outlook and approach to life.

Hopefully these tips will assist you in having a better "solo" Valentine's Day than you might have been headed for. Enjoy the day by doing something fun. Then focus on your relationship plan and empower yourself to build the healthy, lasting relationship of your dreams.

Toni Coleman is a licensed therapist and relationship coach in private practice in McLean, Virginia. She specializes in working with singles who want to create lasting, intimate relationships. Toni has over 20 years of post-masters experience in relationship counseling and coaching with singles and couples. She is the founder and President of LifeChange Coaching and Consum-mate Relationship Coaching. She developed and teaches the Creating Lasting Relationships Training, a tele-workshop designed to help singles to define, implement and fulfill their life and relationship goals. She has also written numerous email classes for singles on all aspects of meeting, dating and relating. She is the author of the email newsletter, The Art of Intimacy, which goes out to thousands of subscribers monthly. http://www.consum-mate.com


MORE RESOURCES:

Queen Latifah Ready to Shed Holiday Pounds
People Magazine - 13 hours ago
"I'm glad I re-signed [with Jenny Craig] because I had a little fun over the holidays, as most people do," says Latifah, 38, who announced this month that ...
Queen Latifah Ready to Shed Holiday Pounds TheCelebrityCafe.com
The 35th People's Choice Awards With Queen Latifah eFluxMedia
all 396 news articles


DUI arrests up during recent holiday period
MSNBC - 8 hours ago
Arrests of allegedly intoxicated drivers over the holiday period ending Jan. 1 were up in most north state communities compared to 2007. ...
Police double DUI arrests over holidays Bristol Press
all 13 news articles


Recession, bad weather pummel Trans World's holidays
Schenectady Gazette, NY - 12 hours ago
By James Schlett (Contact) GUILDERLAND — The holiday season opened a Pandora’s box at Trans World Entertainment, which saw sales during that period take a ...
Trans World holiday sales plunge on economy, weather Video Business (subscription)
all 23 news articles


Food banks provide for the hungry long after the holidays have passed
Lakeville Journal (subscription), CT - 5 hours ago
By WHITNEY JOSEPH HARLEM VALLEY — The holidays may be over, but the need among area food lockers is still great. Too often those needs slip into the ...


MLive.com

Fishing away through the holidays
MLive.com, MI - 7 hours ago
by Jeff Barr | Kalamazoo Gazette KALAMAZOO -- Don't you love Thursday holidays? Christmas and New Year's were both on Thursday this year, and it makes for a ...


Retailers Pull Back Holiday Search Spend
Adweek, NY - 8 hours ago
NEW YORK Retailers put the brakes on search ad spending as the holidays neared, according to a new study. SearchIgnite, a provider of search marketing ...
US Retailers Increase Paid Search Spend, Adjust Strategies Amidst ... Business Wire (press release)
Retailers Increase Paid Search Spend WebProNews
all 14 news articles


The Associated Press

Steinberg says Democrats could vote to eliminate state holidays
Sacramento Bee,  USA - 7 hours ago
... lawmakers to permanently eliminate two paid holidays and change holiday overtime rules for state workers Steinberg noted that state employee contracts ...
Video: Governor Critical Of Democrats Over Budget kcratv
Governor's Veto Leaves Uncertainty in Growing Budget Crisis California Progress Report
All the news you missed over the holidays Sacramento Bee
Sacramento Bee
all 540 news articles


St. Louis Post-Dispatch

Recycle your holiday waste
News & Observer, NC - 17 hours ago
The City of Raleigh is making it easy for its residents to "go green" in the post-holiday season by collecting discarded natural Christmas trees at the curb ...
After holidays, recycling grows or: 'Tis the season for recycling St. Louis Post-Dispatch
Holidays are over, what now? Zanesville Times Recorder
Xmas Tree to Ex-mas Tree Washington Post
KESQ
all 131 news articles


Big Brothers Big Sisters Bring Holiday Magic To Children's Lives
The Manchester Times, NJ - 9 hours ago
By Keith Hagarty What is normally your typical upscale banquet facility and restaurant/ lounge was transformed into a child's holiday delight when La Bove ...


DCSki

US Ski Resorts Buck Economic Trend Through Holidays
First Tracks, UT - 16 hours ago
Some resorts are reporting visits up 40 percent over last year's Christmas holiday period. Weather clearly seems to be a determinant, as some regions ...
Holiday business on Aspen's slopes down 8 percent Aspen Times
Snow Descends in Macedonia, Bulgaria and Albania, to the Relief of ... Balkan Travellers
all 25 news articles

Holidays - Google News

home | index |site map
© 2006